Yes. The laziest man in Los Angeles County, (which would place him high in the runnin’ for laziest worldwide) would be proud of my non-accomplishment as a blogger. Like every tool who’s ran for President in last 200 years, I made promises. I promised continuous posts, reviews, sarcasm, a debt free nation and the legalization of marijuana – but just so all the pot heads would have nothing to talk about anymore. Needless to say, I haven’t written an actual post since February. I’d like to blame it on a Roland Emmerich scale disaster, or maybe Kristen Stewart, but we all know that would just make me want to write more.

You see, I love film. I love it so much that I spend a lot of my time watching it. Instead of writing about my experiences, I twitter something real quick then proceed to watch something else. When I do sit down to write, I usually have to clean up my desktop, which includes cleaning my actual desk, then the house, then the car, and then I play StarCraft. Luckily my girlfriend has red hair and loves film as much as I do. By “loves” I’m referring to a girl who was dementedly grinning and gritting her teeth when Terry Crews was blowing people to pieces with an MPS AA-12 “Sledgehammer” during The Expendables.

See? You miss my idyllic rambling and over-exaggerations. I’ve been to tied up with sitting around, talking about going to the gym and complaining about Twilight to actually write something that will make someone want to punch something soft and cute. I really would like to apologize for my Lebowski-like behavior. I will not, however, promise to write more. Hopefully I’ll just feel the superfluous guilt to appease my two readers or actually motivate myself enough to share my unhindered thoughts about something you probably would have enjoyed otherwise.

So what exactly have I viewed in the last 6 months? Here’s a quick list with an unoriginal grading structure:
Daybreakers – C
The Book of Eli – B
The Lovely Bones – B-
Edge of Darkness – C+
Crazy Heart – A-
The Ghost Writer – B+
The Crazies – A-
Cop Out – F
The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo – A
The Runaways – B+
Hot Tub Time Machine – B+
Date Night – C-
The Joneses – B+
Kick-Ass – A
The Good The Bad and The Weird – A
The Losers – A
Iron Man 2 – B+
Robin Hood – B-
MacGruber – D-
Get Him To The Greek – C
The A-Team – A-
Invictus – A-
Coco Before Chanel – B+
Toy Story 3 – A+
Despicable Me – A+
Predators – B+
Inception – A+
The Expendables – B-
Scott Pilgrim VS The World – A

There was also about forty others on Netflix, including all of South Park and Dilbert. Looking back though, I realize that many of those were total crap or completely forgettable.

I also attended SXSW again, and enjoyed the crap out of Austin. I saw several great films and two that were really worth mentioning. Monsters, which had incredible CG that was completely done by the director on his laptop, and The Happy Poet, which was about as feel-good as they come.

I wish I had taken the time to write about all these experiences while they were still fresh in my mind, rather than trying to recall them by saying phrases like “Yeah, it sucked pretty hard” or “I remember something awesome happening”. I’ll try harder at not to letting myself lapse like that again. After all, Walter had buddies die face down in the mud back in ‘Nam so I could write this rigmarole for you chowder heads to read.

As an avid patron of the cinema and intransigent critic of filmmaking, I do not attend films and movies for only the sake of entertainment, but feel that it is my duty to immerse myself in the story that is unfolding onscreen. There are many genres and styles of film that I find imaginative, real, creative and intriguing. Granted, there are many films/movies that I enjoy simply because they are entertaining, as we all do. Anchorman may never cease to be my favorite comedy, and I heartily enjoy Die Hard, and I must admit I will always have a guilty pleasure for Milo and Otis (I grew up on it).

Needless to say, I have broad range of taste in film and like to expand my horizons whenever I can. My Netflix queue is constantly growing, and with each film I scratch off the list, 3 more take its place. Some say that its a waste to spend so much time in front of the TV, and I wholeheartedly agree. But… is that time better spent in a book or in front of the computer? Yes and no. Like I said earlier, I don’t watch films for the sake of taking up time. I watch them to learn, to watch how other filmmakers tell a story, to try and understand what is trying to be told. I look at it the same as reading a book. What is the mystery? How is the dialogue enriching it? How is it unfolding? A film is just a visual representation of someone’s story to begin with, so how is this visual representation best telling that story?

Granted, there are scores of god-awful excuses for film that make their way to the screen every year, many of those making gratuitous amounts of money, but there are also unseen and unnoticed gems that get produced, often independently, that are incredible works of art. Ink and Primer for example. Both had a minimal budget and were produced completely independent of any studio interference. While Primer gained respect from various film festivals, such as SXSW, Ink’s only popularity came from fans that found out about it through the filmmakers tweets and what little news they got from a Colorado art theater. Both are incredible stories that most moviegoers, even avid ones, don’t know about.

My point here is this: Story is apart of life. Film is just a visual story being told through someone else’s vision. Some are great story tellers, and some should be sentenced to watch their own films on loop for eternity. Either way, whether you enjoy film like I do, or whether you see it purely as entertainment, take a moment and think about the story that’s being told.

As you may have noticed, nothing has been actually posted to redunk for several months. While each author has his or her own excuses as to why, for the most part this started as one of those spur of the moment, “lets make a website with X as the topic! It’ll be for the awesome!” ideas.

As with 98.3% of said ideas, this one fluttered quite lively for sometime before drowning like a limbless cat in a swelling ocean. It’s not that it was a bad idea, it was a pretty kick-a idea in fact, its just that our attention spans are limited to about 140 characters.

Here’s what I’m trying to say: Redunk is not dead,  however, it is going to start taking a new direction. That is if I can discipline myself enough to consistently update it. There will still be the occasional rant, as well as something ridiculous that fits the redunk standard. What it will start focusing on though is film reviews. Don’t worry, they will keep the same format as the original redunk reviews, making sarcastic remarks and exaggerations of awesome. I’ll be slowly working on a rating system though, so if you’re an opinionated snob like me you’ll have something to measure a movies worth with.

Check back soon as I plan to start adding reviews almost immediately. Oh, and just so you know, these reviews will not all be new movies that are currently in theaters. They will consist of what I watch via Netflix, torrent… er, I mean “borrow from a friend” and what I actually own/purchase on DVD.

*torrent has been used for parody purposes only and is not a valid source for viewing films, so before the MPAA calls the dogs, understand that its a joke. I SAID IT WAS A JOKE! WHAT ARE YOU… HEY TAKE THIS BAG OFF MY HEAD! WHAT’S GOING… *thwack*

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